“When I’m with you…I don’t feel different. I feel like, for once, I’m not being judged.” from @writers-are-writers
A/N: I’m on a roll!
Right from the start, Bucky never felt like he belonged with the rest of the Avengers. Sure, they’ve all had their tragic pasts, but he believed his was the worst of them all. He was part of the group that they were made to destroy. He’s killed many people. Some bad. Some good. Bucky Barnes didn’t see himself as a good person.
But you did.
You watched from afar at first, observing Bucky. You noted his mannerisms, each little tick. All from his body language, you could tell he was insecure. He always looked like he wanted the Earth to open up and swallow him whole.
You wanted to change that.
You started off small: giving him small smiles and greeting him every morning. Once he started to respond back with his own small smiles and greetings, you moved to the next step: light conversation. You’d ask him about the weather or how his day’s been going. At first, it was just a few words or a couple of sentences. Eventually, they were full fledged responses like, “My day’s been kind of bland, but I saw a cute dog. So that was neat.” that exact response made your heart soar.
You then started to open yourself to him. Just letting him get to know a few things about you like about your family or your favorite past times. It was one night where you unexpectedly found him sitting in a lounge chair on the compound’s rooftop that he opened up to you. You were going to leave him alone, he looked so peaceful, but he insisted you stayed.
You sat beside him and gazed upon the night sky. That’s when he spoke up, “When I’m with you…I don’t feel different. I feel like, for once, I’m not being judged. I always feel like everyone else is walking on eggshells around me. They see me as fragile or afraid that I’ll snap back into the monster they know. Everyone sees me as either a monster or a fragile vase. But not you.”
“First off, they don’t think of you as fragile or dangerous. They just don’t know how to handle the situation. Plus, you don’t ooze any approachable vibes at all, buddy.”
Bucky chuckled and stared down into his lap, “I guess you’re right.”
“Of course I am! I’m always right!” you said jokingly.
Bucky looked up at you with so much softness and fondness, “I’m really grateful for what you’ve been doing, Y/N. It means a lot to me.”
“You’ve gotten a second chance at life, Bucky. I’m just trying to make it as enjoyable as possible.”
Bucky then gulped, “Would you like to, uh, go out for some coffee? With me? Sometime?”
“Yeah, tomorrow morning? After your run?”
“Sure. Sounds good.”
“Great!” you kissed him on the cheek and stood up from the lounge chair, “Well, I’m gonna head to bed. Good night, Bucky. Don’t stay up too late.”
He nodded, “Alright. Good night, doll. Sweet dreams.” Bucky waited until he heard the door open and then close. He gave out a sigh of relief and mentally patted himself on the back.
Toad's Cave 