artofkelseywooley:

artofkelseywooley:

They could have gone a bit more on the “bigger, cooler, more grizzled” looking Keith. Little does Lance know that Keith reached such the peak of manliness that he was able to spit out a child produced out of spite and gay thoughts. 

And yes, this season did utter destroy me. Creating crapping comics about the silliness of space time is how I cope. I assure you I’m as dead as Shiro inside.

On a side note, God of War is a good game. Thanks for coming to my Tedtalk. Enjoy my silly comic.

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au where lance is a tv show magician who does hidden camera stuff and keith is the unsuspecting victim to a blind date

lance: hey! you must be keith 🙂

keith: yeah. lance, was it?

lance: correcto. i’m gonna order a drink, do you want anything?

keith: yeah, maybe an ice blended caramel macchiato–

lance, folding the menu and placing an empty glass under it: alright 🙂

keith: what are you doing?–

lance, pouring out ice blended caramel macchiato from the menu, somehow, into the glass: getting your coffee 🙂

keith:

lance, pushing a filled up glass to keith: here you go 🙂

keith:

keith:

keith: what the fuck

keith: i’m in one of those magic tv shows aren’t i

lance: yeah, you okay with that?

keith: definitely. i need a straw though

lance, pulling one out from behind his hands: gotcha covered

keith, somehow already completely used to this tomfoolery: is that sanitary

lance: so…. keith. while we wait for our food…. what’s your favorite color?

keith: red, you?

lance: blue, haha. funny though, i actually got a red tattoo on my shoulder

keith: could’ve gotten it from anywhere

lance: well, true but–

lance, pulling up flannel to reveal a red and blue heart with the word keith on it, arrow piercing it: you get the gist 😉

keith, lowkey swooning: for fuck’s sake

keith: ah, damn, they ran out of sugar

lance: oh i’ll get that for you

lance, covering the salt shaker and rubbing on the glass: it’s sugar now, try it

keith: lance that is very sweet of you no pun intended but can you actually? change it back?

lance: lmao no i haven’t learnt how to yet

keith, when food arrives: ah, the waiter didn’t gimme a spoon–

lance: waving his hand in front of keith and producing a fork and a knife: here you go

keith: clean ones, lance.

lance, waving his hand, knife and fork disappears: 😦

keith: you’re not gonna order anything?

lance: nah

lance, picking up a ceramic plate: i love the cronch

keith, staring in horror as lance starts eating the plate: what the fuck did i get myself into

lance: are you impressed by my tricks yet?

keith: do one more and maybe i’ll consider

lance, grinning: okay. check under your arm

keith, checking under his arm:

keith, eyes widening as he sees lance’s phone number:

keith, looking up with a flushed face:

lance: 😉

keith, exploding into a flustered mess: holy fuck

keith: okay, you may be the magician here, but i’ve got one trick guaranteed to blow your mind.

lance: oh? make me swoon, pretty boy.

keith, making direct eye contact with lance, plopping a cherry stalk into his mouth:

keith, exactly three seconds later, sticking his tongue out to reveal a perfectly tied butterfly ribbon:

keith, placing the stalk on the plate cooly: how’s that, hot stuff? 😉

lance: f u c k

lance, rubbing the back of his neck: so… good date?

keith, smiling: definitely one of the best.

lance: okay. alright. one more trick before i leave?

keith: sure

lance: poof. you got another date now.

keith: wha–

lance: second date? if you want

keith:

lance:

lance: ah, never mind, dumb question–

keith, pulling lance close with a giddy grin: you’re a convincing magician

Happy Birthday Keith!

either Shiro makes an offhand comment about how it’s “Too bad Keith can’t be here on his birthday” or Lance already knows because of course he had to know every detail including date of birth of his rather cute rival

Lance of course hadn’t even been thinking what day it would be on earth until he walked back to his room and saw his dangling calendar, with each day red X’d off and noticed the date,

With the rest of the paladins, Allura and Coran all asleep, Lance grabs a sack of ‘supplies’ and sneaks out to Red, after a bit of fiddling around with Pidge’s tracker-that-he-can’t-pronounce-the-actual-name-of, he gets the Blade’s location,

Going unannounced to the BOM hideout was not a smart idea, he almost got killed 9 times over when he got there before he was actually recognized, despite the giant lion. But in the end he is welcomed in, he asks where Keith is, a random blades says they would call him, but Lance wants to surprise him

He goes to the training room where Keith had just finished a fight simulation, attention locked on shining his blade, when Lance sneaks up behind him, pulling a party hat made from tape and cardboard with a scraggly ‘happy birthday’ on the front, just able to get it onto Keith’s head before a blade is against his throat.

Keith had spun around, pining him to the wall and ready for a surprise battle, but his eyes go wide in disbelief “Lance?”

Lance grins, not fazed by the lowering blade “Hey buddy”

He hugs Keith and lifts him the slightest bit off the ground before rushing to his bag, pulling out a container of some kind of sweet tasting food Hunk had made earlier and two spoons
Keith is still in shock, why is Lance here? did something happen? is everyone alright? he hasn’t even given half a thought to it being his birthday.

His mind is racing but none of the blades are in panic, Lance is still rummaging in his bag without hurry and he has absolutely no clue what to do when Lance tries handing him a spoon

“Well come on! we have to eat before you get your present~” Lance grins wider and pats the ground next to him for Keith to sit

hesitantly he gets on the floor next to Lance, taking the spoon from his outstretched hand as well. “What are you doing here? did something happen?”

“I’m here for your birthday, duh” Lance opens the container of food, setting it between them

Keith looks even more confused than before “What are you talking about?”

“Well,” Lance leans back on his hands, he needs a story quick “the rest of the team couldn’t make it, some mission, but they all said the wish you Happy Birthday when I got here”

Keith can’t believe it, they remembered his birthday? he didn’t even remember it, not that it mattered anyway. But to know that they cared…

Lance senses Keith’s problematic inner thoughts and takes his spoon “Alright, enough food goos, you have a present to open!”

knocked from his self loathing Keith tilts his head while Lance places a lumpy package tied in random galaxy newspaper onto his lap.

Rocking back and forth in excitement Lance looks like a kid on Christmas, and it isn’t even for him “Well come on Keith! open it up!”

He opens it slowly, much to Lance’s chagrin, he carefully unwrapped it instead of tearing into it like Lance had hoped, and was about to do himself if Keith didn’t get a little quicker.

inside is a medium sized, handmade plush stuffed hippo, soft purple fabric and big button eyes staring up at Keith who almost certainly had tears welling in his eyes when he realized this was the fabric he found Lance stitching up before, he had just assumed Lance was making another pair of Lion slippers

Keith looks up, Lance is smiling at him again, this time much softer

“Happy Birthday Buddy”